1 reason I love cloth diapering!

Asher 1 week

Asher 18 months

Same cover in both pictures!

Dinner with Dukeman

It is winter break for all of our former youth group kids.  It means lots of visits from old friends.  One of those regular visitors is Tim Dukeman.  Tim was part of our youth group all 4 years of high school.  He is now in grad school in Memphis.   We see him almost every time he is home.  This trip was special as he was bringing home his girlfriend and wanted us to meet her.  For those of you that know him - yes he has a real girlfriend.  It was a fun evening spent telling stories about Dukeman.   It is entertaining to see our kids grow up and see that in a lot of ways they really don't change.  He is still the loud opinionated kid he was when he was in high school.  Let me give you a little background on Tim and my (Bethany) relationship.  It was a love/hate relationship.  Some days I loved him, other days I hated him.  Tim knows how to push my buttons.  Tim loves confrontation; I flee from it.  When it comes to personalities we are night and day.  For those of you involved in ministry Tim is the kid that makes you doubt if you should be doing this anymore.  Tim is the kid whose parents give you a thank you note when he graduates thanking you for loving their difficult son. Tim was never a bad kid.  He just was a little hard to get along with at times.  His nickname in youth group was fun sucker.  So you may wonder why would I invite him over every time he comes home.  Because like every other teenager that ever came through our youth group, I love him.  The new bonus to him being an adult is - he has matured and grown up.  Every time he comes over now he thanks me for putting up with him.  I will be honest, I have had kids thank me over the years.  Each time it is a reminder that God did use me in their lives.  With Dukeman it is different to know that he caused me stress and is sorry about it.  There are not words describe how that makes me feel.  Visiting with Tim and the other ex-youth members the last few weeks makes me miss youth ministry - but that's another post.

So for those of you that don't know Tim you may wonder what is this post about.  One of our family goals for the year is to have a different family over for dinner each month.  Tim & Carrington were the first.  We have a list of people to invite but the year is not full yet.  If you would like to be added to the list pick a month and let me know.  Don't worry I won't write a blog about you. 

I did ask Tim's permission.  Not that I needed to. Check out his  group on Facebook & you will understand.

Messy House

Last week my friend posted on her blog the difficulties of keeping things clean while you are home schooling.  She even posted a picture of her messy counter and asked us to do the same.   We are blessed to have an extra bedroom in our house that we use as a school room.  Everything is organized and labeled.  I even have a chalk board.  Here is a picture of the room

This is the room in which I spend the second largest part of my day.  This is the only room in my house that is ever clean on a regular basis.  Here is the reason - the toddler is not allowed in this room ever!  The twins are only allowed in this room when permission is given and usually that means an adult is already in the room.  So you may wonder how do I keep them out?  Baby gates are my best friend.  But here is the problem: while Eliana & I spend hours some days working on school,  the boys have free reign of the house.  So on an average day this is what my living room looks like.

This actually  is not that bad.  Most of the mess is toys. Some days I find cereal all over the floor, wet wipes and diapers spread every where.  The furniture has even been rearranged and tipped upside down.  This is also only one room!  I'm not brave enough yet to post pictures of the mounds of laundry all over the dining room table or the kitchen sink full of dirty dishes.

My friend's post reminded me of a speaker I heard at the Cincinnati home school convention last spring.  I enjoyed her session so much I bought her book.  Susan Kemmerer wrote Homeschool Supermom... NOT!   On the first page she shows a picture of her kitchen counter which looks very similar to mine. It is a great read.  She shares real stories of her life as she home schools her 9 children.  She connects Scripture with what is going on in her life and how she has learned from it.  It is a good reminder for me that homeschooling really isn't all about my kids but also what God is trying to change in me while I train my children.  So maybe some day I will be honest enough to post pictures of the kitchen or even worse my bedroom!  Until then I will continue on this journey to which God has called me.

In Praise of Fathers

Eliana informed me at the dinner table a few nights ago that I was not her father, but that her father was in heaven. I am her dad, God is her father. I love that she is already thinking theologically, and surprising me with her thoughts on the Bible. After being taken aback by her comment I was a little hurt inside. I am over it now. If she views God as her father already that is a really good beginning to her spiritual journey. My job is to train her up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord. Part of that process is forming a view of the Father in her heart and mind that is true to who He has revealed Himself to be. Where I (as a flawed father) will fail her in many ways throughout her life, he will never fail her. He has promised to always be there and always be the same. I will not always be there, and I know that I change, sometimes daily.  The conversation brought forward many thoughts in my mind about what it means to be a father. Unfortunately I sometimes feel as though I am wandering aimlessly in the wilderness trying to learn exactly what it means to be a good dad. I want so badly to be the perfect father to my children, even though I know that goal is unattainable. No father has ever been perfect, and I will not be the first to reach that mark. With that understanding in mind, I take comfort in the fact that my daughter simply views me as dad. Her father is far greater than I, and He is the measure of perfection toward which I strive. I am merely a surrogate, a physical representation of a non- physical reality. I am not claiming some kind of heretical incarnation, just trying to describe the gravity of the position of fatherhood. Please don't congregate outside my home with torches preparing to burn me for claiming to be God. I claim nothing of the sort. But seriously, if we all as dads consider the fact that we will shape the way our children view their Father in heaven, will that not make us more aware of what a daunting task it is. It is a task we are not suited for, apart from the influence of the Holy Spirit in our lives, and His guidance in our parenting.

May I learn to rely on the guidance of Scripture and the Holy Spirit in my fathering, and may my children then learn the nature of their Father by watching the behavior of their dad.

Tech Tickets

For the twin's birthday this year we got them Leapsters. We intended to keep them busy on our flight to Disney with these.  Since this is our first experience with a gaming system we had no idea what we had gotten ourselves into. If it were up to the boys they would play them all day long.  We quickly learned we needed to come up with some way to monitor game time.  We already limit what and how much TV the kids can watch.  Thanks to my new time waster pinterest I found this great idea:  Technology Tickets.  This blog contains another mom's creative solution - the kids are given tickets at the beginning of the week for the entire amount of time they can play games, watch TV and play on the computer.  I tweaked the idea to fit our family.  I made up tickets on the computer.  Each child has a different color.  That way they can't steal from each other once their tickets are gone. I used card stock that I had lying around.

 I used 15 minute increments.  Eliana is struggling with 1/4 hours, and I thought this would help her apply what she was learning.  The kids got the tickets on Monday morning during school.  I started with 5 hours for the week.  Even as I type it still sounds like too much.  The tickets are good for computer time, TV & movie time, Leapsters and playing games on daddy's Kindle.  They don't have to use tickets for computer time that is for school or if we watch a movie during family time. I gave each of the kids an envelope with their tickets in it.  We then hung the envelopes up in the school room.

I'll let you know how it goes at the end of the week.  Would love to know what you do at your house?  How do you monitor time?  How much time to your kids get?

2012 Books to Read

Books Bethany plans to read in 2012

January:
Taming your family zoo - Donna Jones
Love Times 3 - Darger Family

February:
The art of simple food - Alice Waters
Choreganizers - Jennifer Steward

March:
Bringing up Girls - Dobson
Raising maidens of virtue - Stacy McDonald

April:
Busy Home school Mom guide - Heidi St. John
So Long Insecurity - Beth Moore

May:
How to be a Hepburn in a Hilton world - Jordan Christy
The well trained mind - Susan Wise Bauer

June:
When you rise up - R.C. Sproul
The food revolution - Jim Robbins

July:
Gone with the wind - Margaret Mitchell
Lies home schooling moms believe - Todd Wilson

August:
The memory keepers daughter - Kim Edwards
Rekindling the romance:  loving the love of your life - Dennis Rainey

September:
Grace for the good girl: Letting go of the try hard life - Emily P. Freeman
The way they learn- Cynthia Tobias

October:
Choosing to see:  Mary Beth Chapman
Coming home to eat - Gary Paul Nabhan

November:
The history of the wife - Marilyn Yalom
The husband project: 21 days of loving your man - on purpose with a plan - Kathi Lipp

Decmeber:
I didn't put anything here because I know I will find other books through the year I would like to read.  I'll add them to December.

Week In Review

1.  We are 1/2 way done with our school year! 

2.  We had a great field trip to petropics!

3.  We spent the entire afternoon at the park with friends.  
     It was 50 degrees in Illinois in January!

4.  My dad has always used the expression you could break an anvil.  An expression I never understood until I had boys. 

The boys broke Jeremiah's bed this week.  We have no idea how they did it.  It is broken well enough we are going to have to weld it back together.

History report from Eliana

History of Illinois

The ferst tribs in Illinois were the foxs.  Illinois yoost to have bears a long long long time ago.  Smaller than 2000 french people ferst lived in Illinois.  After the French came the British.  The British stade in Illinois. 

 Illinois state flag

The state flower:  violet

The state fish:  blue gill

The state bird:  cardinal










Look for a post next week where Eliana tells you about our field trip to Petropics.

The Beauty of Literature

One of my goals for this new year is to expand my mind by reading classic literature. I remember learning in school who wrote the great books of the past, but we never really tackled any of those books. It is likely that if we had I would not have been interested anyway, as the only thing I took very seriously in my teenage years was honing my ability to drain three pointers and dribble behind my back. Since the NBA has refused to recognize my abilities I now look for other things to occupy my time. One thing I now believe I missed out on in my formative years was an exposure to great literature. I have always loved to read, but have never been a huge fan of works of fiction. They always seemed frivolous and unimportant. I have typically chosen books that dealt with what I perceived as important issues such as politics, theology, and history. However, I  recently discovered that truly great literature does deal with such things in a way that challenges the way I think, while also entertaining me.

I have been devouring The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoyevsky for a week or so now and I cannot get enough.  The richness of character development, along with the depth of the story has completely captivated me. And the political and theological discussions within the book keep me arguing with myself long after the book has been put down. The book is rather intimidating, but once the intimidation factor is overcome the reward that awaits is well worth it. There will be upcoming posts as I feel I simply must flesh out some of the ideas contained. Some of the other books I plan to tackle in the upcoming year are no less daunting, but I hope all will be as fulfilling as this one has been up to this point.

As a side note and parting thought I simply must sing the praises of my Kindle. I put off purchasing an e-reader for some time now because I did not want to pay for everything I wanted to read. We frequent the library, and most of what I want is available there. I had no idea that most of the old books that I really love are available for free on the Kindle. My mother-in-law surprised me with a Kindle for Christmas and since then I have downloaded over fifty books while paying for only three of them. Public domain books can be found for free download. There are a multitude of great histories, works of theology, and classics available for the taking. The problem is that now so many are available at my fingertips that it becomes difficult to stay focused on just one. I feel like a spoiled kid on Christmas morning flitting back and forth between the multitude of treasures within my grasp.

Twin's 4th Birthday

What is in that moon rock?

 

Mr Potato Head Rice Crispy

You have saved our lives

There's a snake in my boot!

Hamm never got a tail

The Birthday Boys!

Thanks to everyone that came!

The witching hour

You all know what hour that is.  The hour before dinner time when everyone is hungry, crabby & tired.  I  try to avoid this combination by having a dinner plan.  Last night that didn't happen.  We have just started back to school this week.  I am still trying to get back on a schedule.  I realized at about 4:30 I had no idea what I was fixing for dinner.  So I went to the freezer to see what I could possibly fix.  I prefer following recipes - last night that was not an option.  I settled on chili.   

Now let me tell you a little back story about chili.  For almost 12 years I have tried recipe, after recipe, after recipe.  Not one has been a keeper.  So rather than follow a recipe I used what we had on hand.  Here is what I came up with:

1/2 Lb ground venison                                                                
1 small onion diced
3 large cloves of garlic diced
1 Quart of tomato juice
1 cup tomato sauce
2 cups chicken broth
4 beef bullion cubes
1/4 cup chili powder
1 Tablespoon Worcestershire sauce
1 Tablespoon oregano
2 Teaspoons cumin
1 teaspoon basil, pepper, sugar
1/2 teaspoon paprika
2 teaspoons hot sauce
2 handfuls of green chiles
16 oz can kidney beans

I browned the venison with the onion and garlic.  I then added the chicken broth, bullion cubes, tomato juice & tomato sauce.  I let this simmer for about 15 minutes.  I then added the spices, chiles and beans.  I let it cook for another 15 minutes, then served with cheese, crackers, and sour cream.

I now have a keeper!  Trevor loved it.  The kids thought it was too hot.  Next time I'll put the chiles in after I have served up theirs. Now if I can just find a go to recipe for spaghetti sauce I will be in good shape.

Tuesday's with Trevor

While reading one of my favorite authors recently I had to stop and laugh at his view of the family. It struck me both as incredibly funny and so very true. He was making reference to the fact that some critically assess the family institution as being full of problems, and therefore an unhealthy or bad institution. While that criticism certainly has the element of truth within, it is nonetheless shortsighted. What family does not have problems? What family always gets on well together? In what institution do human interactions always commence in an orderly, congenial fashion? To even mention the political institution at this point is laughable to say the least. And what of the institution we call church? Whether you disagree with my referencing it as an institution or not does not alter the fact that some human interactions within the church can be less than congenial. These interactions are, however, vitally important in our lives. As such, we should be realistic in our expectations.Our families will not always run like a finely tuned and impeccably maintained machine. (If you disagree, please do not respond with the five steps to a healthy and perfect family. Or perhaps do, I certainly enjoy a good laugh.)

To quote G.K. Chesterton from Heretics, "Of course the family is a good institution because it is uncongenial. It is wholesome precisely because it contains so many divergencies and varieties. It is, as the sentimentalists say, like a little kingdom, and, like most other little kingdoms, is generally in a state of something resembling anarchy." If your family is anything like mine you recognize the truth in that statement. I sometimes have wondered why my children and wife do not think just as I do. How much easier would life be if the people in my home could simply be more like me? But then, in a moment of realization, I see that I do not think exactly as my parents do. I do not see things as my brothers see them. Though we agree on many, many things, I can think of specific differences of opinion that I have with each member of my family; and given enough time with any other person, I would find differences of thought there as well. Chesterton makes reference to the fact that the family is a training ground. It is in learning to work through our differences with our families that we are prepared to work through differences we encounter in the great, wide, and often wild world. He states it best when he says, "The best way that a man could test his readiness to encounter the common variety of mankind would be to climb down a chimney into any house at random, and get on as well as possible with the people inside. And that is essentially what each one of us did on the day that he was born."

May my home always be a place in which we disagree respectfully, challenge one another politely, and love one another unconditionally. "For all the law is fulfilled in one word, even in this; thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself." (Gal. 5:14) Oftentimes your neighbor sleeps in the next room and eats at the same table.

Stewart family blog:)

HAPPY NEW YEAR! 

Welcome to our blog.  As a family we are trying something new.  This is our way of sharing our lives with you.  It is also a way for us to record all the things that are happening from day to day.  Look for posts from all of our family members - well maybe not Asher.  For those of you that love hearing the stories about the boys latest ordeals we will keep you updated.